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Earl said a lot of interesting things this last weekend. Not that he
doesn't usually, but somehow we seemed to have even more to say to each
other than usual. You might think seeing each other frequently would
cut down on our conversations, but it seems like our desire to talk to
each other increases proportionately with how often we do it.
What I'm remembering, though, is Earl saying, 'People who read your
journal might have this impression of me as some brilliant guy with a
twisted sense of humour etc etc. Someday one of these people is going
to meet me and go "Huh? I don't get it."'
And he's right, really. Earl is polite around people he doesn't know,
but very quiet except for occasional wry comments. Around our friends
he's much more talkative, but his conversation focuses almost
exclusively on ideas. He's glad to listen to people, but he's much more
interested in what they've been thinking than in what they've been
doing.
If I think about it, I can remember what it was like for me to talk to
him before I got to know him. I felt stupid, mostly. He talked about
what he'd been reading and the new ideas it'd given him, and I never
seemed to have anything to say to that. I ended up spending a lot of
time silent and overwhelmed, and we had some amazingly quiet car rides
before we started learning to interact with each other. Now, of
course, we can talk and talk and talk without stopping, and my memories
of him from two years ago seem to belong to a stranger. I know he's
changed some. I know I've changed a lot.
I wonder if other people have that experience of Earl? I wonder if any
of my other friends wonder what to say to him, and feel uncomfortable
(but flattered) when his attention is on them? I don't think so,
really. He does what all the Techers do; he just does it to a greater
degree.
Rachel suggested a few months ago that, in having Chryse dislike Martin
so much, I'm acting out my own anger about the near-worship half my
friends seem to hold Earl in. I sort of wonder if she's right. How
frighteningly sensible and healthy of me.
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