Every time I try to write this entry my network connection vanishes. Is this a sign?

Yesterday. Let's see. I was going to code a lot, but was interrupted by Millbrae, by a very long meeting, by the company Open House (which I narrowly avoided -- Vivek and I made commando raids on the food and otherwise I kept as far away from the visitors as possible), and then by gaming. Millbrae was informative but rather rough going, and made more difficult by the fact that my therapist has the gall to go on vacation for the next two weeks. How dare he go have a life? Especially now, when things are so ... unsettled?

Honestly, I only mind a little. I hope he has fun.

Gaming was very slow and passive, partially because everyone was tired, partially because Mike ran Chicago, which we hadn't played in seven or eight months, and thus nobody remembered what their characters had been doing, or indeed even what their personalities were. But Susan wanted to play, and nobody else cared enough to argue, so we did.

After gaming Jim and I went home and curled up to read, only to realise around around 2315 that it was the 12th of August, and thus our nine month anniversary. Nine months since we'd admitted that we were romantically interested in each other. Nine months since we discussed the impossibility of doing anything about it, and decided to forge ahead anyway, doing what was ethical and hoping things would work out.

And have they? Yes, for me and Jim. Not for Earl. Poor Earl. I feel as bad as my inner turmoil will allow me to be -- or rather, I do feel very bad that I've hurt him, and that he continues to be unhappy. But examining what I'm doing on the inside, I know beyond a shadow of doubt that I did the Right Thing. Which, of course, doesn't make it any easier on him.

Work. Coding. My screens are poorly defined, but I slog on anyway, spending too much time trying to figure out what the hell the people who drew the storyboards were thinking. Tim (the Product Manager) has apologised a few times for the haphazard way in which development is progressing, but this doesn't really keep me from being angry every time I have to waste an hour running around making people interpret things.

Music. I continue to listen to Over the Rhine constantly -- like six or seven times a day. I have a fine stack of unopened June Tabor CDs patiently waiting their turn, but at the moment they don't have a chance.

Books. I read a ton of stuff during WorldCon -- How Much For Just the Planet? (amusing but frustrating), The Princes of the Air (mostly excellent) and Fugue State (medicore) by John M. Ford. Godstalk (choppy, unsatisfying, but with some nice pieces) by P.C. Hodgell. I also at long last finished David Brin's Startide Rising (actually quite good, although slow), and have given it to Rachel so that she may give it to Jeremy.

Now I'm back to library books. I plan to go to the library tomorrow and turn in the old ones I've finished, and likely get some new ones.