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March 8, 1999
a year ago


Woke up incredibly sore and still tired from a night without enough sleep. Got up to a blue sky and clear day, and slowly sent through the checklist of Things To Do in order to have the house ready for relator to rampage through the house with people. It took far longer than I'd hoped. That was a pain. Fezzik was even dry and clean so there wasn't really any cleanup we had to do after him. We're really going to have to watch some of that in the mornings.

I also brought a few things to work that I didn't want to have lying around the house for random folks to just pick up, tuck into a pocket and walk away with. There's so few people at work right now that it should be safer than our house, now. That's kinda sad to think about. Sadder yet is that we actually locked the house this morning, for the first time in quite a while. I guess we have to get back into that habit. So we left late enough that I was kind scared about getting to our morning appointment on time, but we got there in plenty of time, things went smoothly and we got to John's doc's place in time to find out that there was nearly an hour wait. Monday morning after a sunny weekend... and folks were in tight.

So we went, instead, back to work, where I waded through a pile of mail and calendar stuff and things that I had to deal with but had nothing really to do with work. Oof.

It took a long time to get things together and my brain was hurting nearly as much as my body, then, a bit after noon I went to my dentist's appointment to get my new bridge started. Problem was that I left a bit too early, so I had nearly half an hour before my appointment when I was just blocks from the dentist, so I took a little detour to the UW Bookstore and bought myself a palette knife that the watercolor guy used in his book. Now I can experiment with it. It was surprisingly inexpensive and seems well made.

The dentist visit was educational. The casts were made of my teeth and they were good. Problem is that the amount of time left for us here isn't quite enough time to finish the whole bridge, so I'm going to have to fly back some time, likely when we close on the Redmond house, and get the bridge actually put in. The first three appointments are to make sure that various things fit and to put a dummy in for a while. This is going to be interesting to see how long the dummy can actually last.

The afternoon was burned mostly on the above and getting other things set up. Stuff happened with various accounts, and all the new software tools took getting used to as well as all the additional security problems that happen with remote sites. It was just a real pain, dozens of things that were out of my control spun even more so, and it just started to splinter what little brain I had.

Finally, I figured out a good thing to do with having all my best pens at work, it's that I've left all my dip pens and inks at home, so that I can use those for writing instead of something that gives me less time to think. This should be good.

The day's turned dark and grey and dreary, damp and drizzly. The sky, though, is this deep, dark shade of lavender as the sun's going down and the trees are just black webs of bare branches against that amazing light. I read more in the watercolor book on the way back from Boulder, and realized the truth in the book about the fact that watercolors are about playing with light, about bringing out the light amid all the color and trying to get it to glow properly. The hardest thing is painting so that the light comes out right

By the time I got home I was severely unhappy. Mostly from pain in the body and the whole mind problem with all the changes at work that were making it impossible to get anything really done. Then dealing with the impeccible house broke something inside and I just couldn't deal anymore.

So I had John pull out the sewing machine. I found all the patchwork pieces, and John went and got Chinese take-out while I sewed stuff. He also took Fezzik on his walk in the rain, and took care of the dried mud when Fezzik got back, and I just didn't give a damn about anything. I sewed and wrote until about midnight, and John went to sleep around ten. I was just so overloaded I couldn't deal with anything, even trying to stop and sleep, I think...

Finally, I went upstairs, decided this was stupid and got ready for bed and used one of the Go To Sleep aromatherapy bath salts. It really got me more sleepy, but my brain was spinning in twenty thousand directions at once, and the bath helped slow some of it down as well as leech some of the pain from all my muscles. That helped. Eventually, it all slowed down enough that I could actually lie down and keep my eyes closed in the bed, and eventually I went to sleep.

My dreams spun in all directions, though, bits and pieces everywhere and of everything. No single story, no single focus, and complete gibberish when I actually woke up. But it was interesting to realize that my dreams really reflects some aspects of my waking state...

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