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February 8, 2000
two years ago


Today started with a two-hour meeting. It was a meeting about all the problems that remained in the system, and an all-team effort to prioritize and evaluate all the problems left to see what we could fix, what we didn't want fix, and what we could put off for another day. It was a complete evaluation of everything we had left to do, and a set, very clearly, what we are going to do in the next few weeks. So we all came out of the meeting very energized and ready to tackle things.

On the most part, I feel pretty good about the stability of the system and of all the things that we have control over. It's a very good place to be this late in the development game. There were quite a few things that I had on my plate, directly from the meeting. There were instant code reviews, sections of code were under evaluation for risk levels for changes. It is better to have many eyes and minds going over the sections to help evaluate the extent, necessity, and effectiveness of the changes. It's a very good way to minimize the risk.

Of course, today, without any warning, Geoff never showed up on-line. Mark used to do things that looked like this near the end of various periods in our relationship, just disappear without a word, and when that happened back then, I turned into a complete wreck, couldn't do a thing because I was crying all the time and wondering what I did wrong. Because he would only ever come back when I cried at him, or when he finally had to say that he needed a little space, which implied that I was pushing too hard. Most of that always ended up with me being the one who was wrong and had done something to chase him away and then wronger yet for asking what was up. As evidence that I have actually grown up some, or, perhaps, evidence that Geoff and I built something a bit more solid that started with complete independence on both our parts, or, just that John has helped me immensely with stability for the last few years; I did just fine today. Probably all three. I got stuff done, talked with people, didn't fall apart, ate my lunch of tomato soup and White Castle cheeseburgers, and even had fun.

Late in the day, Geoff managed to get on for just a moment and told me that his telephone was out of commission for the day, and he was in from work for just the moment. Just knowing what had happened really helped the subconscious voices that were going on about, "What did I do wrong?" It was really good to know that it was simply a situation entirely out of anybody's control, and since Geoff didn't know if he'd get telephone back tomorrow, there was a good chance that he wouldn't be on tomorrow. It was amazing to me the difference it made just knowing that.

I was exhausted, though, when it was time to go home. John and I joked about having another pizza dinner, but I really wasn't in the mood for more fast food. Instead, we went to Safeway to look for pork chops, then it turned out they had massive amounts of pork loin on sale, including chops. We didn't get the ten pound Value Pack, instead we only got two chops, some sweet potatoes, and a can of cream of mushroom soup. When we got home, John hopped onto the exercise bicycle, and I put the water on to boil for the sweet potatoes. I also put together a small green bean casserole with some of the soup concentrate, a handful of French's onion rings, and little Worcester sauce. I then coated the chops with Shake N Bake, and put them into the oven. When the water started to boil, I put the sweet potato chunks into the water, and then slid the casserole into the oven alongside the chops. When the sweet potatoes were done, I drained them, and then put a little brown sugar, butter, and milk in with them and mashed them with the potato masher. They came out sweet and buttery and rich with flavor, much better than regular mashed potatoes, especially against the flavorful, crisp-edged pork chops. The green bean casserole came out creamy and tender with just a bit of crunch from the canned onion rings.

Much better than delivery pizza.

John got his ride in, and was very content with dinner. We watched TV afterwards, and I made hot chocolate and spun tussah silk. It is the rough-cut silk, pale blond in color, and it is the stuff I use for socks because it is so strong. I have several skeins of flame-red yarn and one of 100 different greens that all eventually have to be made into socks or something. I still have a promise to Cera to make her socks. John also wants a pair of mismatched socks, one in each vivid color way with gold silk heels and toes. I also wanted to make Geoff one of my Mobius strip scarves, and since he seems to be as blond and as tough as the silk itself, it seemed the right match. In any case, I really do need to spin more of the three-ply silk, which is always something of a joy.

One surprising thing is that even though it does make my hands ache to spin, it is a different enough ache that it doesn't seem to be affecting my typing. What is better yet is that my wrists don't seem to be any worse for the evening wear. We'll see if that is actually a long-term thing, or if it is just because I'm taking frequent breaks when my hands get tired.

Brought to you by Dragon System's Point & Speak.

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