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May 27, 2001
two years ago
three years ago


8:34 pm: Today was a lot slower day. We just stayed home and did stuff around the house. There were lots of things to putter about and do while one or the other of us took care of Jet. We both bot naps, we got a few more weeks' worth of pictures up on the web site, and did baby laundry. We got lunch, and a simple enough dinner, and lots of stuff for breakfast, leftover donutes, the Weetabix we'd bought Friday night, and I wanted some turkey bacon for protein.

Weetabix are a British cereal. Just biscuits of oats and grains and stuff that you can crumble into a bowl and pour milk on. They were really yummy, not too sweet, and really full of fiber of various sorts. I liked them in Britain, 'cause we'd eaten them at various bed and breakfasts, and it was fun to find them on sale at the local store.

It was nice to simply stop and be. Not go anywhere, not try too much, and not worry about it. Just be ourselves at home, with some chocolate chip cookies and not too hot or too cold a day. We spent most of the day with the windows and doors open to the air outside as it was much fresher than what was inside.

John got a good long nap in the late afternoon and Jet ate and napped and got to sit, for the first time, in the swing. You know those swings... that just keep swinging and swinging and most babies just fall asleep in them. The old ones were wind up, but the new ones are battery powered, so you don't have to stop to wind them up. Jet wasn't too sure of it, yet, but he may like it more as he gets happier about sitting up by himself.

By the end if the day, sadly, my guts weren't happy with me. I suspect that this is another aspect that I won't really like about the cinnamon rolls. Ah well. Hopefully, Jet won't have gotten the gassy stuff or have the digestive problems I'm having.

It's so nice to just be able to rest and be lazy. To not have to take care of Jet all by myself, and to be able to know that I have time. Simply time. We get another week like this off in July, and I'm going to be very glad of it. Time to nap, time to play, time to simply be with John and Jet.

The book The Scientist in the Crib basically concluded the parents and babies pretty much naturally know how to interact with each other. Parents are wired to teach their kids the things they need the most and kids are wired to learn like crazy. So the expert view was that there really isn't anything specific that has to be done, other than give parents and kids 'enough' time together. They did admit that that was pretty hard to do these days.

It's kind of funny thinking of what I'd been planning before the birth. Dump the kid on others as soon as possible, and work like nothing happened. Experience gainsays so much. I am changing with all this in ways I never expected. Still, I think I do believe that having exposure to other adult caretakers and kids is important, so Jet will have some time away from me. I am glad of it for myself, too.

It's such an odd juggling act. To balance the moving and changing line of dependence and independence, of development and capability away from us. If we do our jobs right, then Jet is going to walk right out of our lives, and live his own. Each development is a step away and it's a good thing. Now I see, though, why it's such a hard thing for some moms to do.

It's so strange to balance it, enough for him to grow, not so much he's neglected. Though, admittedly, there's likely a wide swath of possibilities in between. From some books and 'experts' there seems only a slender thread between the two. I just have to remember the reality that there really is room.

Carl likes to remind me of something I once said, that everyone that is really good at something was, at one time, only someone that wanted to be good at it. I really want to be a good mom, and that might be enough motivation to learn and grow and change in all the ways I have to to become that. We'll see.

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