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July 23, 2001
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A Good, Normal Day

8:09 pm: A much calmer, quieter, and cooler day, today.

Jet had a quiet night. He was up just a bit before 3, and since John's knee was bothering him badly when he went to sleep, I did everything for the feeding pretty cheerfully. Jet was happy to be gotten, and he settled in solidly for a feeding and then sucked down 2.5 ounces of formula with no problem and just fell back to sleep when I put him back down.

Jet woke up at 6, and when I went up, I decided to just breastfeed him and when he fell asleep after the second one, I put him back down and he slept for another hour that I badly needed. John got up at 7:30 to take care of Jet, and I stayed in bed until 8. I then showered and put myself together and had to be really careful of my cut finger. Like a really deep paper cut the aluminum foil had cut really clean really deep and it was such a sharp cut the cell walls were having problems binding back together, and the cut kept splitting last night, so I was trying not to straighten it without a Band-Aid to help hold it closed. That was a bit of a pain.

John's knee was much better, stiff, a little, but it was holding his weight pretty easily on the stairs. That was another lesson thoroughly learned.

I didn't quite have time for breakfast before Jet wanted to eat, and he ate pretty steadily after a rocky start at 8:30. So he did fine at Joan's, just playing like crazy there and going to sleep at 10:30. When I picked him up at 11, he woke up and wanted to eat again, so I obliged until lunch time.

John made chicken, Tommy's chili and cheddar quesadillas that were really good. Jet liked the taste of Tommy's chile, Herdez mild salsa, and cheddar he got. I figure a single taste isn't going to hurt him too much unless its a virulent allergy of some sort. I guess, of all things, Tommy's chili might trigger something; but he really liked the stuff.

After lunch, at 1, I had my appointment with CeLena. It was what worked two weeks ago, but now it feels like a tremendous disruption. Especially since John told me he had a 1-2 meeting today. It was a small meeting, so they understood that he'd have to take care of Jet during it, but it just felt kind of weird. I believed I had a meeting at 3:30, so I had plenty of time for the appointment. Still, it just felt kind of disruptive to my day to run off and have such a relaxing massage and then have to dive back into work.

CeLena did a great job on my back, shoulders and arms this time. She did touch on my legs and stuff, but didn't spend too much time on them and did spend a lot of time on my really tight upper arms and forearms. That was really nice.

I got pack, and Jet needed to eat, so I fed him, and he really wanted to stay close for a long time. John had a 3-4 meeting, so it was good to keep Jet quiet, and right at 3:25, he fell asleep, so I put him on our bed, covered him with a blanket, and he stayed asleep. That was perfect, from what I believed of my schedule. I called into the conference call with my celphone because John was still on the house phone for his meeting, and I was startled and disappointed to hear everyone in the meeting saying 'good-bye' to each other.

I'd gotten the meeting time wrong in my head. There was a meeting right after this one that was supposed to be something most developers needed to attend, which was why my meeting had been moved by half an hour. I'd just gotten which half hour wrong. I was sad.

Yeah, I hate to admit it, but I was actually sad about missing a meeting. It was one that I was looking forward to attending because it's something that'll started to affect quality of our products all up and down the line. And this was one of the planning meetings, no one actually doing anything, yet, but this is when all the cool ideas get talked over and we figure out what's cool and good to do soonest rather than later. So I was pretty disappointed.

On top of that, the night's activities were finally catching up with me, and I was pretty tired. Also, I ran into a problem with the test harness I'd been working with for the last couple of months and I felt really bad. It didn't help that I had this inner voice telling me how stupid and awful I was for having missed the meeting for as stupid a reason as just forgetting or never even remembering the right time.

So I took a breath, and Jet started crying as he woke up downstairs. So I went down and picked him up and jollied him a little and John took him to take care of him while I worked. Jet started fussing in earnest, and it sounded like he was gassy. John said that he'd burped him, some, but the minute I had Jet up in my arms he burped up on me. I think he saves it for me, and it was kind of cool that Jet was immediately a much happier baby.

I guess after yesterday, a little burp-up is just kind of cool, now.

The day had never been as hot as yesterday or the day before. The sky was cloudy and cool, and John and Jet out into the rain to let it rain on them a little with the excuse of getting the mail. I kind of envied them, but I felt better after simply making Jet feel better, so I settled in and worked some more on the harness and getting separate tests for the different platforms. The problem was that our application really did do different things on different platforms and the tests originally assumed that they'd be the same for both.

Luckily, there is stuff built into the make setup that can let some things run on one platform but not the other in the course of a make. So I could have some tests that ran on one but not the other. The other thing I found out was that the automated tests that were built in the course of the whole company's build had output expectations pretty much in line with what the harness provided. That was cool.

By the time I was done with all that Jet was hungry again. John brought him up and I fed him while John organized the last of the four weeks' worth of pictures we'd taken of Jet. We had interrupted all that yesterday when Jet took his spill, and today we got it all done. That was good.

By the time we were done, it was time to feed Jet some solids. We tried apples, and he made an awful face at the fire spoonful, but then ate nearly half the jar, easily. Mmmm... apples.

When he finished with that we thought about pizza, and decided that going to Niwot and Abbo's was faster than getting delivery and we'd get exactly the kind of pizza we wanted. They have a really great thin crust pizza with really huge slices that they'll put almost anything on. It took us just 15 minutes to get there, and I had one slice with mushroom and sausage and another with onions and pepperoni. John had jalapenos and sausage and another slice with Canadian bacon and pineapple. Such a plethora of variety. I also was able to get a root beer float.

It was wet out. Grey and cool and just a bit colder for the humidity. Jet was very happily wrapped up in his rainbow silk and flannel blanket. He snuggled down into it and played with it for the whole meal. He made the world go away and come back countless times and it fascinated him every time. He liked watching us eat more now that he'd eaten before we had, and was pretty content during the whole meal to just watch us and play with his blanket.

He fell asleep on the way home, and then woke up as we were getting out. So he had only two half hour naps today. I don't know if that's because of the extra hour this morning, or if it's just the way he is right now.

John and Jet are playing now. Lots of playing with toys and being on the floor. They're doing 'horsy' right now, kind of, with Jet riding John's tummy, and they're doing "sit up; face plant!; sit up; fall over!; sit up; face plant.." That's pretty funny to watch and it's certainly distracting Jet from the fact that he's probably hungry, at least until it's time for his last feeding.

I'll probably have John warm up some of the frozen breastmilk for the last feeding, because I didn't get to pump today, but there's a pretty large store of the stuff after last week. I think that I'm finding that the manual pump works well enough for most of the times when I really need to pump. So we might return the expensive pump. I can still feed him even without the electric pump. Then again, it's so nice when I want to do a very quick pumping. I'll still have to think about all this some more...

Libras, we can't ever decide until we weigh everything a thousand times first.

Well, time to feed him. I'm glad today was so much nicer. It's so good to simply enjoy a happy, content, and secure baby.

He passed out pretty much the moment he was done. That's a very nice way to let the baby go to sleep. It's just so easy to just put him down and have him pretty much be asleep. There's also plenty of humidity in the air tonight, so no drying out or bloody noses.

It's 63 outside, compared to 73, yesterday, at the same time. I'm so glad it's cooled down so significantly. I actually put on leggings and my hot milk (with just a touch of honey) is steaming gently. Wow. Steam you can actually see, usually, it just gets absorbed by the air. The rest of the week is supposed to be like this, though it'll likely be humid and warm in the mornings, the rain feels so good against the skin.

Someone once said that human beings were basically made for tropical climates, and, admittedly, I do need more clothing in these kinds of temperatures; but I like being able to put on more layers. There's only so many I can take off. And given that human beings live in all kinds of climates, I guess there's plenty of room for someone like me, that feels like they were made for the cooler, wetter climates, rather than these dry, hot and high places.

And it's far nicer nursing Jet in this weather. When we're that close and it's hot out, we're both a sweaty, sticky mess. Today was cool enough to be really comfortable just holding him so close. That was one of the reasons I loved the early morning feeding so much. It was just so simple and so comfortable and comforting, all in one.

I can see why some mothers just don't give up nursing their children for years. I don't think I'm going to go too much longer, but I don't know, either. A year seems okay to me, now. Before he can walk. I also, practically, want to go to DunDraCon in February, and I'm not going to be able to while I'm still nursing him, so that might be a big incentive to wean him before then. Also given his progress with solids, I can see a really solid path to giving him foods that'll last him longer.

The one thing I'm going to have to learn is how Joan puts Jet to sleep without nursing him. She does it every day, nearly, and he sleeps just fine. He goes to sleep and he stays that way for the time he's there, at least, and sometimes he goes another hour when he's home. So it's obviously possible. I just don't know how to do it, yet.

I think that weaning would have it's hard points anywhere along the line, and for a toddler it would have to do with discipline things as well as simple physical removal. At this age, I know that Jet would have some frustration at not getting the physical comfort and time from me all the time; but I think with a lot of cuddling with each feeding he might be okay. Later on it'll be more the changing of a habit than the switching of the satisfaction of some need. I think a habit would be harder. A need has to be satisfied and if the only satisfaction comes from another source, then that's where one goes. A habit is what is wanted.

Anyway... I ramble... and I need to sleep. It's been a good day and I'm glad of it. I'll wish you good-night. Good night.

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